Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
