Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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