Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
only you would photoshop your dick
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize
