so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
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