You're so nebulous sometimes
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
