There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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