Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
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