Even the bartender felt bad for me
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
