I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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