In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Terrible idea I love it
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
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