at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
