dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize