what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Bring me that man meat
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
