okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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