Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
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