I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
