Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Randomize
