She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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