It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
