Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
No more Irish car bombs ever.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Just got blown whilst getting my high score on bejeweled blitz. There's still a month and a half left of summer and my bucket list is empty...
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
