ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
BTW, does Anne know that we used the lipstick she is currently wearing to was used to write the word "ASS" on my ass cheeks last night?
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
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