Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
it was like his penis was on wheels.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
