Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
