Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Randomize
