dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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