Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
