Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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