"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Randomize
