Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
