He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
I need to stop coming to work sober
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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