Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
