I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
