I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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