I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
