Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
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