And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
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