at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
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New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
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Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house