He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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