I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize