your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
