My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize