What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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