He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
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