One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My mom just walked in and she was like "Who ate all of the cheese?" and all I could think of was you trying to become a human taco
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
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