a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
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