smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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