This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
