This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I'm pants shitting drunk right now
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize