Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
