i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
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