3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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